The Webchutney Blog

Make that 3 bronzes and one shortlist for jaagore.com. Goafest 2010 came and we showed everyone what we’re made of, all over again.

Here’s what we won:

• Website (Consumer Goods): SaffolaLife
• Branded Content for Internet including Games: Mastercard TravelSmart
• Creative use of Social Media: Saffola Heart OK Please

A big thank you goes out to our awesome clients at Marico & MasterCard for believing in these ideas and making them bigger and better with their support. More from Goafest with embarrassing pictures (as is the tradition) coming up soon.

This is a heads up to all those nice people who love to waste their time on Facebook and Twitter and what-have-you. If you’ve ever aspired to work for this hallowed organization, here’s your chance.

We are looking for a bright young guy or girl, who can join us at Bombay as a Social Content Manager. Primary responsibilities will include in-house management of social communities for our digital marketing campaigns, an awful lot of which are likely to be social networks in their own right. Additional responsibilities will include working with the leadership within to hone our service offerings in the social space.

Notable character traits in the incumbent should include:

• Active on all major social platforms. Drop us a link to your Friendfeed Account so that we can see for ourselves.
• Ideally have six months of experience in a Social Media/PR Agency. If someone can vouch for you, nothing like it.
• Excellent writing skills. Show us your blogposts and things.
• A sound emotional quotient.
• An eye for usability. Must be able to think in terms of feature augmentation for the social web applications we create, and tell a good idea from a bad one.

Interested? Write to Meghana at meghana [dot] bhat [at] webchutney [dot] net with your resume and other stuff you want to show us, and you could find yourself with a gig at India’s number 1 digital agency.

Update
Subsequent to this blog entry, it was found that people were emailing all sorts of resumes to the above mentioned email address, which has made Meghana mighty pissed. Meghana is Associate Creative Director at Webchutney and is accepting resumes only for this position.

For everything else, the guy to spam is our Human Resources Manager, and he is available at samar [dot] abbas [at] webchutney [dot] net.

Update 2
The bloke has already been hired. Thanks for the enthusiasm folks.

Webchutney just got spanking new merchandise. Everything is getting bigger, better and meaner. Okay the point is, we have a table now (table tennis table) and also we have brand new sun umbrellas up in our open roof café which read Webchutney. The two are not related and we DO NOT like to show off. We are totally against branding. That’s why we have branded notepads, pens, bags, and cars for now but later we plan to make Gautam Joshi spray paint Webchutney on his Mohawk.

“Supplies are available on the ground floor. Volunteers can take appropriate actions.”
Coming back to the table tennis table now you can admire the pretty table in the pictures. Your views and comments are most welcome.

After standing on a single foot, meditating, deep breathing, push-ups and praying, he began playing. The only Chinese table tennis player in our office. He says,“nǐ hǎo!” to you.

Yash beat this man in the game and later made him toss chowmein.

Arunabh Biswas does Jitendera on the table. Don’t miss the graffiti on the walls.

It's a bird, it's a plane, no , its Baba Ramdev again!

Sattvik Mishra and Yashdeep Bali go one on one as Arunabh Biswas and Eshita Jayaswal watch.

After having lost the game , Sattvik refused to share his table tennis bats with the rest.

Yashdeep paid me 20 rupees to put up this picture only because he thinks that he does not look fat in this one.
What do you think?
a)    He is fat
b)    He is so hot. Sign my rack Yash.
c)    You are so cheap
d)    What can you do for Rs.10?

Since Sattvik Misra lost his game, he was replaced by Arunabh. Total knockout it was, Yash in god mode.

His service is almost impossible to return but then Yash returned all aces.

Carefully observe the Webchutney branded sun umbrellas. The guy on the left, with lesser hair  is Ganpati Chaudhary, the executive chef at Ganpati Ka Dhaba, Webchutney. The guy on the right is Umakant Parida, the most eligible bachelor after Rahul Gandhi.

Don’t they look really pretty? I love the “branded” umbrellas!

“These umbrellas have totally changed my life. I have started cracking better jokes. And now people laugh at my jokes too. Thankyou, Webchutney sun umbrellas!” – You know who!

The Webchutney sun umbrellas come with an adjustable height lever.

Have you realized that Webchutney plans and implements beforehand? Does the picture above strike any chord? Yes, we have in advance prepared ourselves for the scorching summer sun! DOH!

Now you know why we have just the perfect tan.

You can find one of the major pull factors from the carte du jour at GKD in the picture below. You know what GKD stands for no? If any queries, you can write to us. You can also drop in emails to Mr.Ganpati at ganpati.chaudhary@webchutney.net .

Ganpati Jee doesn’t disclose his secret recipe.

Look how Ganpati Jee welcomes you with his arms wide open. Such class. (Actually this is “what a lovely Titanic pose!”)

Hardy har har, I am a Ghetto superstar.

We would like to hear from you. I promise I will send some love back. (Any co-relation to the valentine week is purely co-incidental)

This Friday was exceptionally sizzling and to beat Dilli ki Sardi we had invited Mr. Aag Baboola. You can see below Samar Abbas welcoming Mr.Aag Baboola.

Taller than Kailash Kher

He may look like Kailash Kher but he isn’t. He is very inspiring also. You can be like him too. Just follow these easy self-explanatory pictures (Do not try this at home, school, office, anywhere). All you need is a torch and kerosene.

We assume that you have common sense. You also do not have to drink kerosene.

Now with the kerosene in your mouth, spit it out. Like this.

Yes. Also don't stop midway.

Some of you are not talented enough to learn from the pictures, so we have put up a video too.

That is pretty much it. Simple no?

You can now do it yourself. We though that the video would be a better help.

Make it longer and make sure you don’t spit the kerosene on yourself unless you want to die a Sati. That’s old fashioned. Super Retro, you don’t want that. You’d rather watch Akshay and Aditya kiss.

With the theme of the party. "Come on baby, light my fire!"

Some found this funny and well, Mr.Arunabh Biswas gave this priceless expression.

“Do you have something to say Arunabh?”

Some people don't find things funny.

Yes that looks very inviting. Priyank does his part, finished the sweet potatoes. Every time I think about them root tubers, I get hungry.

Bhaiya sab de deo! Lekin ye hai kya??

Rahul Nanda, Chief Operating Officer, seen here below eating biscuits. With gastroenteritis all year around; Khichdi and biscuits are the only options.

Guess the brand of the biscuits my man is eating and you can win yourself a cash prize*.

This is just not it! There were too many pictures. You can find them on our Facebook page.

For more fun and exciting adventures go read SRK’s blog and follow him on twitter and shake hands with his watchman at Mannat everyday. Set up a temple and worship him. Also sell your house, car, wife, kids and buy every  possible DVD with SRK dancing around in red pants with plump ugly covered in make-up aunties who win awards each year for totally unsatisfactory acting performances (No not Harman Baweja you fool. He/she is yet to win anything.)

Please, don’t bookmark or subscribe to our blog. Thankyou. Till we bring more invaluable stuff, try handling Baba Retro. (Coming soon on SRK’s blog….NOT! We hate “NOT” jokes….NOT! ) Okay, tata.

With arms wide open, under the sunlight; welcome Rucha. Yes our new design intern has a designer name. Any gaaaasesss? (Read “guesses?”) Okay, I would let her answer that. Read on.

Thats Rucha. Rianna Rodrigues however chooses to call her the PINK PANTHER INTERN. Lets all wonder. Why?

1. What is your full name! (First second third fourth…..last name)

Rucha Patwardhan.

2. When is your birthday? Also mention your zodiac sign; we don’t quite like Linda Goodman you see. (Don’t expect any gifts though, this is just a formality)

12th October, Libra: I am definitely the scales. A little towards the introvert side, but I like getting to know people, just takes a little time I guess. (Pure Libra, I tell you. Classy for sure. Libras are great.

3. What school, what college (if any) and la la blah blah)

Symbiosis Institute of Design, Pune. (I wonder, even Ankur did not go to any school. These guys graduated straight-away. Pure Champs.)

4. Past experiences (by this I mean official experience)

Nope. (Don’t worry; you will have loads of experiences here.)

5. Your happiest moment ever! (Don’t tell me the day you got married, I want honest answers)

I know it sounds really sentimental and all…but still…my happiest moment was when I got a sister(Yes, she “got” her a sister from Wallmart). Yea Yea u can now start awwwwin!! (This makes me wanna(pause), awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Okay I am done. You wanna awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww too?)

6. Your most embarrassing moment! (Yeah baby, so we can totally rip on you)

Well….they are TOO embarrassing to mention! (I wonder why nobody mentions them. No seriously. Why?)

7. What website is your homepage? (What website(s) do you like visiting, or wanna recommend)

Youtube and Facebook are competing for the top spot!

8. What are you good at, apart from what you have been hired for. (I don’t wanna know if you are good at telling jokes! Tell me if you can play football, counter-strike, or other happening stuff)

I really really like game arcades…..air hockey is my favourite. (I am just taking a guess, YOU HAVE NOT BEEN TO A DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION MACHINE NOW, have you?)

9. Any complaints. (I am a trained martial artist; I have always been waiting for this)

I’ll surely let you know when I have any. (Focus julissaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, okay I shall wait with my shurikens.)

10. One song that keeps you going (You can’t say Eye of the tiger, cos that’s mine)

Hotel California- Eagles (See, retro. Classic female we have here.)

11. What employee you look up to, currently (I mean who is the hottest booty around)!

Its too early for me to take any names (Plain. Short. Simple. Well , she has just joined, let the girl take some time.)

12. WRITE A LINE ABOUT LIFE AT WEBCHUTNEY!

Well till now the atmosphere is really spontaneous and chilled. So it has definitely helped get over the ‘new employee’ jitters.

Okay, leave your comments now. The fire-man is coming right up. (YEAH! SURPRISE.)

What do we have here? A new joinee nomenclatured Ankur Srivastav by his granny, the name is very uncanny no? Totally sweet! So we put him to the test, and we expected his best. This is what he had to say.

My mommy still says, looks can be deceptive or photos can be altered.

1. What is your full name! (First second third fourth…..last name)

Ankur Srivastav ( Awwww, too cute no? Sweet and short)

2. When is your birthday? Also mention your zodiac sign; we don’t quite like Linda Goodman you see. (Don’t expect any gifts though, this is just a formality)

9th September. ( Yes and who will tell me your zodiac sign? Okay! Nevermind , I will take you to be busy and help you with your zodiac(s). You my friend are a VIRGO. Virgos are intelligent, shy, conservative and perfectionists. )

3. What school, what college (if any) and la la blah blah)

National Institute of Fashion Technology , Gandhinagar ( Okay ! Nice.)

4. Past experiences (by this I mean official experience)

He has worked with Rajeev Sethi Scenographers and Axind Software.

5. Your happiest moment ever! (Don’t tell me the day you got married, I want honest answers)

There are moments and still more to come , one of them  is leading the team and winning cs tournament. ( Believe you me, this won’t take long)

6. Your most embarrassing moment! (Yeah baby, so we can totally rip on you)

:p ( What is that? You mean whenever you smile ? Or you are not telling? )

7. What website is your homepage? (What website(s) do you like visiting, or wanna recommend)

www.thinkabilitydesign.com

8. What are you good at, apart from what you have been hired for. (I don’t wanna know if you are good at telling jokes! Tell me if you can play football, counter-strike, or other happening stuff)

Playing counter-strike, rise of nations , so many that I can’t disclose.

9. Any complaints. (I am a trained martial artist; I have always been waiting for this)

None so far ! ( Good boy , “here keep my gun back!”)

10. One song that keeps you going (You can’t say Eye of the tiger, cos that’s mine)

Queen – I want it all … ( Lalach buri bala hai you know that, dont’cha?)

11. What employee you look up to, currently (I mean who is the hottest booty around)!

Currently everyone! ( Hey get your eyes off my back!)

12. WRITE A LINE ABOUT LIFE AT WEBCHUTNEY!

We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Crackalackin two f***in thousand ten (2010, you artard). You better thank me for the lyrics.

Rishi, Samar and Shashank are totally elated.

I am all in this Christmas Carols mood ya foo

So Imma bring to you

And you don’t wanna be all up in my grizzle,

You know I got my nizzle fo shizzle, *Santa*

Its gonna drizzle, blood.

You gonna bleed,

cos all my man knows,

BANG BANG SKEET SKEET!

Mithilesh kept staring at Santa's bag for some reason.

For morons only. Sing this in “Jingle Bells” tune. INTELLIGAANCE PEOPLES KNOWS AALREADY NO?

Riding his SUV,

Santa wanted to score,

So we roll up a joint,

And smoke till we get sore!

HEY

Ringing Bells, ringing bells, here comes the Santa gulping a beer can,

With fake white beard and a black moustache, and oh so perfect tan!

HEY

Ringing Bells, ringing bells, he give me candy, and I like it,

And you don’t get no shit not even a single Bangladeshi Taka, because you ain’t got my Christmas man!

Staff shows true team spirit as they rob Santa.

Christmas celebrations in Webchutney saw some of the most polite and shy janta , running after Santa for presents almost desperate enough like Tushar Kapoor pays to act in movies. Carefully notice , Dipanjan , Amit, Shree, Saket and Shashank as they literally loot the Santa.

Santa , say "CHEESE!"

And there was “I want a picture with Santa” syndrome in the house. They all look so pretty. I mean Santa, Samar and Mukesh. What were you thinking? Ladies are simply gorgeous; you don’t want me to keep mentioning that again and again, no? Yes? No. What it is?

Very own Rudolph.

SING in the tune of *Rudolph the red nose reindeer*.

Rishi the bongolly soldier

Strikes a veearrry cutie pose

Rahul has got him horny

Now all he needs is a red nose!

Sattvik and Dipanjan tried doing a Kanika-Eshita pose. Notice. NOTICE.

Don’t you just love pictures taken from ze helicopter? Yes they have that aerial feel to them. Apart from all those emotions, this picture also has Sattvik and Dipanjan nearly stuck to the hip.

Having some serious fun.

Heard Wonderful tonight by Eric Clapton? Yes ! Sing the following lines , like that!

He’s got his hair coloured.

Yellow, red, turkey hair!

Even Arunabh who’s married, gives him a bad stare!

And then he asks me, Gurbaksh! Do I look alright?

And I said, yes Gautam darling, you look kinky tonight!

My crew's all fired up, you better just rise up before the sky gonna light up.

Sattvik, Aakreit and Akshay show us that we had enough booze to knock em out.

Left to right : Santa, Priyanka, Sushil and Nupur.

And no problemo our Santa grew a moustache on the job (that is beer froth). They do a quick “cheers” before they guzzle down em beer.

Okay tata, bye bye.

Yes, I know, you probably think that way too. Webchutney should not be number one. You hope that Webchutney should be at the end of the list where it stands first, but it isnt that way, no? We are f***ing number one!

After almost crying for an hour after watching the video, we present to you, 10 other reasons why we should not be number 1. You hating us , could be the eleventh one. Okay, pumpkin? *kisses*